Sunday, February 24, 2013

Living the American Dream.....

Living the American dream.

Those are words that have entered my brain and thought process Friday night and have not been able to GET OUT.

As you know from my last post I have been super stressed out. Like crazy stressed on many different levels.

I decided to go to my church's Girls Nite Out this past Friday. It's from 630-900pm. You get some yummy desserts, chat with some ladies, sing some songs and watch a short video from a christian speaker. I only decided to go because I could pay $5 and my kids would be in child care for almost 3 hours!!!!

I went, I ate, I talked, I watched video, I had a meltdown. Complete and total meltdown. The speaker of the evening was the amazing Sheila Walsh. I have seen her in person a few times so I knew her video was going to be inspiring and amazing. What I did not expect is for her message to hit me so incredibly hard.

The main thing I got out of the video was "stop trying to live the American dream, live God's dream".
This hit me like a ton of bricks. Seriously, a ton of bricks. I cried to hard you would of thought a ton of bricks really did hit me. Her message was all about life not turning out as you imagined. She went into detail about certain things and it just hit me.

I had to get up and leave the hall because I was a complete hot mess.

After the Girls Nite Out event, a bunch of us went out to dinner. It was so great. We all went around the table and introduced ourselves, gave a brief history of us and told our story on how we all ended up at the church we had the event. I met some awesome ladies and I got to know some ladies even better.

Ok, so let's speed this up. Saturday night we had signed up for a Married Life event hosted by our church. It's a quarterly gathering of fellowship, dinner and a speaker. This month is was at a local Italian hot spot a.k.a. yummy food!!! We got to connect with couples from church that we kinda knew but really didn't know. We chatted. We laughed. We had a great time.

Then the speaker came up. He was such a funny, down to earth, real kind of guy. He spoke on a level that I understood. I won't go into EVERYTHING he said but it really hit home. I am still trying to process things he said along with things from the night before.

So at this time last night my brain was on fire. It was going a mile a minute. I thought I was going nuts. I finally fell asleep around midnight. I woke up about 4am just wide awake.

My mind was racing. My mind had 8000 thoughts.
*How can I stop living the American Dream?
*How can I stop keeping up with the Jones's?
*How can I get more energy at night after work?
*How can I spend more quality time with my kids?
*How can I get Landon to stop acting like an ass?
*How can I save money?
*How can I spend more quality time with my husband?

I could seriously go on and on.

Before this post gets entirely too long, here is what I decided.

I quit my job.

I quit my job. I am going to change my spending habits. We are going to downsize. I am going to spend more time with my husband and my kids.

As soon as I made this decision, lyrics of a song popped in my head "I WILL REJOICE AND BE GLAD IN IT". Just those words have been singing in my head all day today.

New day, new beginnings. I thank God that I woke up today with a brand new perspective on my life.